"I feel like I'm in one of those Tales of the Unexpected dramas that's on on a Friday night. It's all a bit surreal. I'm on some kind of fairground ride, possibly the Waltzer. The last thing I remember is my mother pouring pints of water down my throat. What the chuff has happened to me?" At fourteen years old, Jessica is desperate to grow up and live the life. Her mum, of course, is trying desperately to stop her! Her best friend leads the way, although not always the right way! Jess hilariously gropes her way through the many trials, tribulations and traumas of growing up, paying great attention to the really important things like grapefruit body wash and, of course, sex! Much wit and many wisecracks take us through a journey of friendships, holidays, a rock star sex god, university life and trying to meet her one true love in this prequel to Ah Feck It!